Game 25: Codename: ICEMAN - Final Rating

It’s no secret that I didn’t think much of this game. It was ambitious to say the least, and offered something fresh, but in the end it was just a bit of a chore to get through to be honest. I’m concerned that the PISSED rating system won’t punish it enough, so I may have to call on my correction point for the first time. Let’s see whether that’s necessary...

Puzzles and Solvability
What a place to start! When I look back over my screenshots, it becomes clear that there are only really two sections of the game where traditional adventure style puzzles come to the fore (I guess the ship maintenance sections should count too), and they’re at the beginning and the end. In both cases, there are serious flaws with the puzzle design! The game lets you move on, despite having missed vital information and items, and gives no warning at all that this might be the case at the time, or even later when said information and items are required. More critically though, the parser system in Codename: ICEMAN is simply unacceptable. There were numerous times throughout the game that I was put off the correct scent by the parser not accepting my very Sierra safe commands. I tried to sit with Stacy when I first met her. I tried to get the duct tape off the fridge when I first saw it. I tried entering the coordinates into the diver when I first picked it up. I wasn't able to do any of these things. That’s not cool and I have to punish the game for it.

I'm still angry about the duct tape.

However, I haven’t discussed the rest of the game, which is really just one mini-game after another. Controlling the submarine involves referring to the complicated manual instructions time and time again, and just when you get the hang of things, the game asks you to do something else that you have absolutely no clue how to do. It was like a test of endurance for me, with hours wasted figuring out what button did what, which person knows what, and what command I might need to type. I really didn’t enjoy it. Then there’s the dice game! It’s tough enough having to win games of dice that involve a fair amount of luck, but the game forces you to win an obscene amount of games, and then doesn’t allow the player to save and restore more than three times throughout. They may have wanted to make it a little more realistic by making the player feel the pressure, but it got repetitive and boring very quickly. I haven’t even discussed the diving or driving scenes, which are both confusingly handled. In the end, most puzzles (and therefore solutions) only become apparent when a game over message pops up on your screen, which is just not good game design.
Rating: 3

What did I do wrong this time! Oh come on!!!

Interface and Inventory
Codename: ICEMAN is certainly an ambitious game. It tried to do something completely unique, and the designers had to implement a whole range of keyboard and mouse control systems to make it work. While it seemed very clunky at first, controlling the ship was actually not too bad, particularly once I learnt which actions were better handled by keyboard or by mouse. Unfortunately, the addition of visual diagonal movement (the game was the first to do this) made moving Johnny around the ship harder than it would have been otherwise. It made no difference whether I used the mouse or the keyboard, Johnny would randomly walk diagonally when I was trying to go vertically. I guess I can partially forgive this flaw though, since the game also allows direct movement commands. Manually walking across a room and then lining Johnny up with the bottom of a ladder was not easily done, but it was once I figured out I could just type “climb ladder” from anywhere, and he would do the rest.

You'd think getting from here to the bottom of the stairs would be easy wouldn't you.

The inventory system is adequate, and I was glad to see that the designers didn’t choose to use the horrible text based system that appeared in Police Quest 2. Since there is no better place to talk about it, I have to mention in this category that Codename: ICEMAN is filled with bugs. Quite a few times I was unable to view my inventory, instead receiving a message saying “Sorry, not enough memory”. There were a couple of times where commands I typed brought back information from something that wouldn’t occur until much later in the game, such as when I was being told about the Captain’s injuries before he’d even taken a fall. I even had at least two occasions where mini-games screwed up on me and certain triggered events never occurred. All of these bugs led to masses of confusion, and in a game which would have been difficult already, they made it almost unbearable to play. I’ve already fired some shots at the parser, but this is technically the right place to do it. I will just reiterate that its limitations are unacceptable for a text driven adventure game, and move on.
Rating: 3

What head injury? Sorry, who did you sedate?

Story and Settings
Codename: ICEMAN is one of those games where on paper the story would sound pretty cool. Its mix of James Bond and real life naval operations is both unique and geared for excitement and intrigue. However, it’s in the details where things can really fall apart, and that’s the case here. As Charles has pointed out in one of his comments, there’s actually no antagonist, and really there are no critical characters apart from Johnny himself. All other characters appear to be an afterthought, including the secret agent / love interest Stacy. Considering its very possible to (and in fact quite likely that players will) never meet Stacy in Tahiti, her inclusion towards the end is fairly irrelevant. She offers a map and access to an apartment, but that could just as easily have been handed over by the fisherman that gives Johnny access to the harbor.

Well let's ask Charles since he never even met her!

Probably my biggest problem with the story though is the writer’s inability to give any of the circumstances a legitimate reason to occur. There’s no way anyone is going to put an inexperienced outsider at the helm of a high tech submarine with a mission to save an Ambassador and in all likelihood prevent full scale war. There’s also no way that the same outsider would be left alone to fix problems with the ships weapons systems. I realise most games take liberties like these, but they at least try to make some sense of it. The only time I saw anything like that in Codename: ICEMAN was when the captain fell and was therefore out of action for a while, but he was standing by watching me screw up for the rest of the game. I guess if I’m going to find positives, it’s that the plot is by far one of the more serious on offer so far, and has more resonance than say, Gold Rush, where the protagonist’s actions are pretty much for selfish reasons.
Rating: 4

Well, since it's your job, why don't you fix it. What? You're leaving?! Where are you going?!

Sound and Graphics
I recall the very first time I started Codename: ICEMAN, I was impressed with the very moody music that accompanied the opening intro shot. A few moments later and I was subjected to horrendous eighties electro as the credits rolled by, then a simplistic, repetitive attempt at reproducing a ukulele for the opening beach scene. Then silence! After a fairly audible start, the majority of the remaining game was comparatively quiet, bringing music back in only for particular scenes. There are some sound effects in quite a few sections, but they too are minimal and unobtrusive. The graphics are probably on par with the likes of the Larry and Police Quest sequels. On the positive side, I actually think the animation is better for Iceman (check out the way the bikini clad women smoothly stroll down the beach), but there’s nowhere near as much variety on offer. The choice of colours in the engine, machine, storage and weapon rooms need to be answered for also!
Rating: 5

Actually she kind of is!

Environment and Atmosphere
The opening sections of Codename: ICEMAN felt like Leisure Suit Larry and the closing sections more like Police Quest 2, but everything in between at least offered something fresh. It’s probably not until The Last Express in the mid-nineties that adventure game players were expected to spend so much time stuck aboard one form of transportation, and I believe that game showed that it can work when done well (I haven’t actually played it mind you). I actually think the game has some decent atmosphere due to the suspense of the situation, but the effect is completely overwhelmed by the frustration of actually achieving anything. Credit where credit is due though and the mix of naval and political themes certainly made me feel like I was part of something important. If there had of been less bugs and repetition, I probably would have enjoyed the experience.
Rating: 5

Well it sure beats "Lolotte is very evil and will use the talisman to bring more evil to Tamir"

Dialogue and Acting
This one’s a mixed bag I’m afraid. In some ways the dialogue in Codename: ICEMAN is fairly representative of the Police Quest series, which means reasonably correct language and jargon to match the setting and situations (most likely thanks to the involvement of a real life navy officer), but in other ways the game feels very rushed, with incomplete descriptions and a noticeable amount of spelling and grammar mistakes. There is certainly a lot of dialogue in the game, with a lot of it made up of ship commands and mission instructions, but that’s no excuse for shoddy play testing. How does something as obvious as the below screenshot get through play testing when it appears right near the beginning of the game. I could have used any of about twenty examples here, so this is by no means a one off.
Rating: 4

Expolsive! Is that bad? It sounds bad!

So that leaves Codename: ICEMAN with a round 40. How do I feel about that? Well, it makes it the lowest ranked Sierra game so far, which seems fitting. Although there was that Black Cauldron game that was pretty average too, and that got 42. That doesn’t sit too comfortably to be honest, but nor does using my correction point to move the score into the positive (that game only took up six hours of my time too, whereas this one took over sixteen). A score of 40 also leaves the game ranked higher than all the French entries so far, as well as Uninvited and Shadowgate, which feels right too. You know what, I think I’m going to have to leave it exactly where it is once again!

I always look forward to finding out who the winner of Lars-Erik's sponsored game prize is. This time the winner is... The Mad Gamer! Congratulations! Wow, that's not the first time a reader with one of the lowest predictions has got it right. Either I'm a very harsh judge or you guys are overestimating the quality of some of these games. Oh well, Hero's Quest is up next!!!! It will be interesting to see what you all think I'll give it, especially as you already know it's one of my very favourite games. I really hope it lives up to my memories, as I haven't played it for about twenty years! Note that predictions will be slightly different for future games. You can all vote for whatever score you really think I will give, and all correct answers will go into a draw (which I'll figure out how to do fairly).

Companion Assist Points for Codename: ICEMAN

It’s time to dish out (and perhaps deduct) some points for those that predicted things and assisted me along the way.

45 CAPs for Jarikith

* Ilmari's Challenge Award - 10 CAPs - For passing Ilmari's challenge

* Companion Award - 10 CAPs - For playing along with me and completing the game

* Companion Aid Award - 10 CAPs - For helping a fellow adventurer in need
* Reenactment Award - 10 CAPs - For hilariously imagining Stacy's CIA briefing

* Minor Assistance Award - 5 CAPs - For answering a question about cylinder length

43 CAPs for Lars-Erik

* Sponsor Award - 20 CAPs - For sponsoring the blog with free games!

* Major Assitance Award - 10 CAPs - For revealing a possible dead end on my request

* Deciphering Award - 8 CAPs - For solving four out of 10 mixed up adventure titles, then donating points to unimural

* Longest Journey Award - 5 CAPs - For announcing the Dreamfall sequel

36 CAPs for Ilmari

* Major Assitance Award - 10 CAPs - For responding to a Request for Assistance

* Companion Aid Award - 10 CAPs - For helping a fellow adventurer in need

* Deciphering Award - 6 CAPs - For solving three out of 10 mixed up adventure titles, then trying to convince me that he didn't deserve 6 CAPs

* Dead End Award - 5 CAPs - For warning me of potential dead ends

* Minor Assistance Award - 5 CAPs - For contributing to a Request for Assistance response

* Destroyer Bug Award - 5 CAPs - For letting me know of a potential bug in the game that was affecting me

* James Bond Award - 5 CAPs - License to Drill

* Ilmari's Offer Award - -10 CAPs - Giving 10 CAPs to Jarikith for successfully completing his challenge

35 CAPs for Charles

* Best and Fairest Award - 20 CAPs - Because sometimes winning isn't everything

* Sandy Award - 5 CAPs - For calling Stacy Sandy and sticking to it for the entire game

* Burger King Award - 5 CAPs - For stopping in for a burger mid game

* Infinity Bug Award - 5 CAPs - For finding the unlimited points bug

30 CAPs for unimural

* Phantasmagoria Award - 20 CAPs - For making my self-judged ridiculously clever riddle seem simple

* Deciphering Award - 10 CAPs - For solving the hardest of the 10 mixed up adventure titles and then receiving bonus points from Lars-Erik for his success

25 CAPs for Fenrus

* Major Assistance Award - 10 CAPs - For helping me figure out whether I should restart

* Minor Assistance Award - 10 CAPs - For contributing to a Request for Assistance response twice

* Greenpeace Award - 5 CAPs - For finding a non-hostile way of getting past the Russian destroyer

15 CAPs for Canageek

* Genre Support Award - 10 CAPs - For commenting about a BIG new adventure game sale on Steam

* Safe Sex Award - 5 CAPs - For commenting on how irresponsible James Bond is to women's health

15 CAPs for The Mad Gamer

* Clairvoyant Award - 10 CAPs - For predicting the score I would give the game

* Grammar Nazi Award - 5 CAPs - For doing the right thing and telling me when I'm wrong

10 CAPs for Corey Cole

* Corey Cole Award - 10 CAPs - For being Corey Cole

10  CAPs for nhil

* Deciphering Award - 10 CAPs - For solving two of the harder mixed up adventure titles

5 CAPs for TBD

* Genre Support Award - 5 CAPs - For commenting about a new adventure game sale on Steam

Game 25: Codename: ICEMAN - Won! - Part 2

Surely this means more sex!

At the end of my Won Part 1 post, I'd just been given a map by Stacy. That map was indeed a map with directions to her apartment, and this time I had no trouble following it. On entering, I began my search for the items she’d told me about. Stacy had mentioned that everything I needed was in the kitchen, so that’s where I started my search. The only things I could find of interest were the three canisters on the counter, which contained sugar, flour and coffee. They didn’t seem to contain anything else though, so I moved onto the fridge. The first thing I noticed was that there was something on the top of the fridge, so I walked over and typed “look on fridge”. The answer I got was “You’ve left me responseless”, so I assumed it wasn’t actually something I was supposed to pick up.

I guess I should strip off and get comfortable.

In the fridge was some typical food items, but the only one I was able to interact with was the butter. There was a plastic bag in the butter dish that contained a note. This note gave me information about the catering company, more specifically that they deliver twice a day to the compound, and that two guards search the caterer prior to entry every time. This was obviously hinting at how I might gain entrance to the compound later, but was unlikely to be the items Stacy wanted me to find. I refocussed my attention on the canisters, and began emptying the contents into the sink. After emptying the sugar, I find that the canister had a false bottom, which when removed revealed a tranquilizer gun stuck between two pieces of foam.

When she gave me the keys to her apartment, she knew I would go through the butter in the fridge to find her note.

Great, so I had a weapon! Stacy hadn’t arrived yet, so there must be something else I was supposed to do. There was a phone on the wall, but I had no numbers to call. It was then that I noticed the small green card on the wall next to the phone, which turned out to be a business card for the same catering service mentioned in the note I’d found in the butter. Interestingly, there were two phone numbers on the card, but no mention as to who the second one might be for. I rang the catering company, and typed “order food” when someone answered. About five seconds later there was a knock at the door, which really put me off guard! I hadn’t actually considered what I would do when they arrived. I opened the door though, and watched as they walked in, put the food on the counter, and asked for payment.

Yes, can you please send someone over here so I can take them hostage and steal their clothes?

I could think of nothing else to do but “use gun on man”, and was a little bit shocked when the caterer begged for his life. Was I really supposed to take advantage of a poor innocent civilian to gain access to the compound? I guess so! I demanded he give me his clothes, and he quickly stripped down to his boxers and asked “what now?” I didn’t really need anything else that he might have, so I tried to tell him to leave in about ten different ways, none of which worked. If I didn’t do anything within about thirty seconds, Stacy would arrive and tell me we were too late to save the Ambassador. I think I restored about twenty times at this point, trying to pick up the clothes, tell the caterer to get on the ground, tie him up despite not having anything to do it with, and got nowhere! I started to think about what James Bond might do! That didn’t work either.

Um...I'm not sure...this is my first time!

I restored back to before I’d made the phone call, and called the other number of the card. A voice answered with “This is Basal! Speak your business!” Once again I was caught off-guard, not having any idea what to say. Who was Basal and why did I need to talk to him? No matter what I said, he always responded with “you’re making no sense” and hung up. Perhaps Basal’s purpose would make sense later? I have to admit I was getting pretty frustrated at this point. I really wanted to finish the game and move onto something more enjoyable, but had to struggle on with no real purpose. Suddenly that object on the fridge caught my attention again. Surely it wasn’t just part of the fridge. What the hell was that thing!?

Basal! Howzit hangin bro!?

There were a lot of things I didn’t like about Codename: ICEMAN, but nothing annoyed me more than the parser limitations. When I walked to the fridge and typed “look on top of fridge” and received “on top of the icebox you see a roll of tape”, I was really pissed off. “Look on fridge” didn’t work, but “Look on top of fridge” did?!?! That’s really bad programming and that sort of thing popped up all through the game. Letting my anger go, I immediately picked up the tape and went back to the phone. The tape’s use was obvious, and once the caterer arrived and had taken his clothes off, I used the duct tape to tie him up. Finally I was able to change into the caterer’s clothes, and then Stacy arrived, proving that I’d now done what I was supposed to do in her apartment. Or so I thought.

Apparently the tape is not "on" the fridge. It's "on top" of the fridge. There's a difference you know!

She advised me to take the caterer’s van and head over to the compound, and also told me not to forget to “conceal the weapon”. I figured I should take the food from the counter before leaving to complete the disguise, but I didn’t seem able to. I also tried to “conceal weapon”, but the game responded with “Don’t be a wimp.” Alright then, it was time to go get the Ambassador! Once I left the apartment, I automatically hopped into the van and drove over to the compound. On arrival, I typed “conceal weapon” again, and this time Johnny hid the weapon in the food that I apparently had ready for delivery. I hopped out of the van and tried to enter the compound. The guard stopped me, saying “You are not the regular caterer. Something is not right here. What is your name?” I answered with a fake name (automatically), and he then searched me and found the gun, ending my game in the process.

Basal? It's me! Come on mate!

Hmmm...how could I avoid him finding the gun? He obviously searched me thoroughly because he didn’t recognise me, but how could I make him recognise me when he’d never met me before? I restored back to the apartment and rang Basal. That number wouldn’t be listed on the business card for no reason. It had to be involved somehow! Perhaps it was the guard’s number? Even if that was the case, what could I say to him that would make him let me through? I tried saying I was from the Caterer’s company in about ten different ways and also tried mentioning the food order, but got nowhere. With no hints whatsoever as to what I was supposed to be doing, I very nearly requested assistance at this stage. But...out of desperation really, I tried typing “talk to man”...and it worked!!!

Because all guards are stupid.

I don’t need to tell you why this bothers me greatly. I’ll just move on as we’re getting real close now. Apparently I explained to Basal, despite not having any idea who or where he was, that I was the new caterer that will make the next delivery to the compound. This of course allowed me to hop back into the van and repeat exactly what I did last time, with the difference being he didn’t search the food I was carrying. Once inside the compound, I found myself in a room with two guards and the Ambassador tied up. I placed the food on the table, removed the lid, and picked up the gun. I typed “shoot”, and was thrilled when one of the guards went down. Unfortunately, my slight hesitation at this point allowed the second guard to shoot me. Time to restore, hopefully for the last time!

Get on the ground right now or I will...make you go to sleep!

The next time I typed shoot, and then immediately typed shoot a second time. That was all it took to take down both guards, leaving me to untie the Ambassador and presumably finish the game. The Ambassador was extremely relieved and grateful to be rescued, and told me so in about eight different ways. While I was listening to him, one of the guards woke up (some tranquiliser!) and shot me. I should have known this game would have one more trick up its sleeve. I restored, and this time after untying him, I tried unsuccessfully to get him to leave with me. No matter what I typed, I always faced a message like “leaving now would doom the Ambassador”. OK...so what was I supposed to do? Leaving wasn’t an option, but nor was staying. Another disguise perhaps? I typed “change clothes” and was thrilled when the Ambassador changed into terrorist attire. Now...we could finally leave!

Ambassador Loyd told Johnny to wait outside. He had unfinished business!

The Ambassador and I left the compound, only to be confronted by the remaining guard outside. “I shall now kill you both!” *sigh* Can this game please just end damn it! It’s like the last twenty minutes of Lord of the Rings! Thankfully, I didn’t actually have to do anything this time. Stacy came to the rescue and took the guard down before he could fire a shot. The three of us hopped into the van and I then watched a cut scene of the van driving up a twisting mountain path to an awaiting helicopter, with terrorists close behind in a jeep. At least I thought it was a cut scene! Once the van reached the first corner, it ploughed into the wall and we all died! I was going to have to control the van myself.

Unfortunately you didn't tell me I had to turn LEFT!

That turned out to be pretty difficult. The controls were extremely unresponsive, and not only did I have to press left or right at exactly the right times, I also had to balance my speed exactly to avoid either driving straight off the cliff or being caught by the jeep. It wasn’t much fun, and at one point I took the option of pressing F8 to skip the whole scene. I just couldn’t handle the fact that I lost ten points for not completing it though, so I gritted my teeth and resorted to save and restore measures. Every time I got around a corner I would save my game, before continuing up the mountain. Once I reached the top, the game did, finally, end!

B A R spells bar!

There was a lengthy outro where the resulting political drama was explained and I was congratulated for my achievements. I was awarded both “the coveted Gold Dolphins” and “The Naval Distinguished Service Medal”, and was also promoted to the rank of Captain! As seems to be norm for Jim Wall games, Codename: ICEMAN finished with the main character getting the girl, as Johnny “tenderly kisses Stacy”. That my friends, is the end of the game, and I can tell you right now that I will not ever be playing it again. I’ve been frustrated by certain interfaces or puzzles throughout the course of this blog, but I don’t think I’ve been as consistently irritated as I have been throughout Codename: ICEMAN. I’m sure the final rating will reflect that irritation.

Save the day, get the girl. Mr Wall is such a romantic!

Session Time: 4 hours 30 minutes
Total Time: 16 hours 30 minutes

Game 25: Codename: ICEMAN - Won! - Part 1

Johnny Westland Journal Entry 6: “I saved the Ambassador! After leaving behind the USS Blackhawk, using an explosion as a diversion, and then making my way to the compound unseen, I was able to make contact with the female agent. In an incredible coincidence, that agent turned out to be Stacy, the woman I spent the night with in Tahiti! She gave me directions and access to her apartment, where I disguised myself as a caterer and then executed my plan to enter the building where the Ambassador was held hostage. Everything happened quickly once I got in, but somehow I stayed alive and got the Ambassador out in one piece. I’ve earned some serious medals for this mission, but more importantly, I’ve now got Stacy by my side. Life is good, and I’m going on vacation again. This time I won't let them disturb us!”

Boy was I glad to finally swim away from the submarine...

Sixteen and a half hours!!!! That’s how long it took me to finish Codename: ICEMAN. That’s three and a half hours more than Zak McKracken and Leisure Suit Larry 2, which were the joint leaders prior to now. It’s not even like I got all that stuck on specific puzzles throughout the game, although I’ll describe some below that had me scratching my head. The real time killers were the “mini-games” and the parser, which screwed with me numerous times. I imagine if I played through from start to finish now I could do it in about two to three hours, but I could be well off with that estimation. Anyway, the home stretch of the game contained some more traditional adventure game puzzles, which had been sadly absent since Tahiti, but even so this post is unlikely to be gushing with praise.

...only to die moments later!

At the end of my last post I’d just put on my diving gear and left the USS Blackhawk using a diver vehicle. I’d turned the game off in protest after the diver malfunctioned due to a missing washer I could never have known about, leaving me to die in the deep blue sea. I knew exactly where I would find the washer that was needed to repair it, and I also figured I’d need one of the wrenches I’d seen in the engine room drawer. After restoring to the engine room, I first “checked” the diver in the same way I “checked” the patrol car in police quest, being informed that it was “running fine except for a slight vibration”. I tried listening to the vibration as well as looking at it, but it was only when I typed “check vibration” that I was told it was “coming from the shaft”.

Even if I had of checked the diver, a slight vibration doesn't seem that bad does it?

“Checking” the shaft revealed there was a nut and washer missing that would secure the prop, but I knew that wasn’t going to be enough. I’d seen wrenches, nuts and washers of various sizes, so I measured the shaft to find the diameter to be ½ an inch. I went off to the machine room and collected ½ inch nuts and washers, then collected a ½ inch wrench on my back through the engine room. I tried to think about what command I would use to fix the shaft. “Fix diver” or “fix shaft” resulted in “you will need to be more specific”. “Put washer on shaft” ended up achieving what I wanted, and “put nut on shaft” continued the success. Using the wrench turned out to be more challenging!

Well...it's damn cold in here you know!

I tried to “use wrench”, “fix shaft” “use wrench on nut”, etc. etc., but wasn’t having much luck. Finally I got it with “tighten nut with wrench”, but these parser limitations really do make what might otherwise be fairly satisfying adventure style puzzles tedious and frustrating. How did they think it was ok to only allow one specific command for actions when numerous others make total sense while remaining within standard Sierra parser standards!? Well, the good news was that I now had a repaired diver, so I set out to go blow this drilling rig up again. I entered the water and began swimming from screen to screen. I’d kind of hoped that the path to take might become obvious, particularly as I knew the general direction I needed to go (283 degrees). Instead, things got really weird! I’d be travelling straight ahead and yet the Heading and Yards seemed to be going up and down randomly.

Heading: F#$% knows! Yards: Anyone's guess!

I thought perhaps I was supposed to enter the heading into the diver. I tried “enter coordinates into diver” and about twenty other variations, but nothing worked. What was I missing? I then figured the likely thing was how many yards away the rig was from the ship. Was I supposed to have found this out too while using the periscope? Is that even possible with a periscope? I saved my game, then restored back to the periscope scene. I tried everything I could think of to get distances to the rig and the mainland, but couldn’t do it. I really wished at this point that I knew something about submarines, and after spending another twenty minutes aimlessly swimming around in hope of just running into the rig, I decided to request assistance.

Making up words is funnerific!

I put a request for assistance comment up on my last post, explaining my current predicament. Shortly afterwards, Ilmari directed me to a previous ROT13 discussion between Charles, Jarikith and himself. It turns out I wasn’t the only person having trouble with this section. Charles was in the same boat (sorry)! After Charles had cleverly described his situation in the form of a limerick, Ilmari had replied with one of his own. “If the problem is just navigation, the solution is triangulation, landmarks are of assistance, find out angles and distance, diving won’t be tribulation.” Well that confirmed my suspicions that figuring out the distance to the landmarks was the key, but how? Out of desperation, I thought I would ask the radio and sonar guys if they knew the answer.

Do I really have to ask for everything around here? I mean, you all realise I've never done this before right?!

While I wasn’t convinced this would work, it did! Talking to the sonar guy and typing “get distance to rig” resulted in “the oil rig is approximately 2850 yards from us Sir”. Winner! I then tried asking how far it was to the gun boat, but got nowhere. Happy that I at least had something to work with now, I made my way back to the engine room and got the diver. I thought I would have one more attempt at entering the coordinates of the rig into the diver, and this time “enter coordinates into diver” worked! I could have sworn I tried the exact same command while swimming and received something along the lines of “you cannot do that”. That’s pretty harsh, but I’d fluked typing the command in the right spot. I entered the distance of 2850 and the heading of 283 degrees for waypoint #1, but then I was asked for coordinates for waypoint 2!

Ha...asking for waypoint 1 suggests there's more than one...oh!

Getting a bit fed up, I checked my earlier screenshots where the captain informed me of the gun boat guarding the harbor. Harbor? Was that the second waypoint? I went back to the sonar guy and typed “get distance to harbor”.  “The harbor entrance is 1640 yards aways.” Ilmari’s hint had given me the focus I needed, but I’d managed to solve the rest myself. I should have felt thrilled, but the game’s pedantic, convoluted nature was really starting to rub my up the wrong way. I felt more relief than satisfaction and really wanted to get off the ship ASAP! I quickly made my way back to the engine room, entered the two waypoints into the diver and made my out into the surrounding ocean.

I tried looking at the timer but wasn't able to. Kind of important don't you think?

With the coordinates successfully entered into the diver, things became so much clearer when diving. The heading wasn’t the way I was facing, it was the direction I needed to go to reach the next waypoint, and the yards were how far away it was. No wonder I didn’t know what I was doing earlier? I very quickly found myself at the oil rig, and “set the explosives” as commanded by the CIA. After the timer was set, the second waypoint appeared on the diver console, so I figured it was time to make my way to the harbor. I eventually arrived at a screen where the ocean floor appeared and there was a slope upwards towards land. Thankfully I saved my game at this point, because trying to move up the slope resulted in me triggering a magnetic field set up to detect intruders. Once again the game punished me for something I could never have known about, and I was forced to restore.

Forced to restore by enemy game developers.

Of course the solution to the magnetic field was obvious. The device I’d won off the old guy while playing dice was supposed to neutralize magnetic fields, so I turned it on and passed the obstacle without further trouble. It was on the next screen that something quite interesting happened. A fishing net suddenly dropped down from above, reminding me of one of the Washington messages I’d decoded earlier. “Locate fisherman’s net. Signal your presence by placing a bottle in net when way is clear...Fisherman will remove bottle.” I put the rum bottle in the net and waited for it to be pulled back out of the water. Thinking that meant I should now emerge too, I moved up out of the water. Again...I was captured and forced to restore! Apparently I needed to hide my diver before exiting the water!

And to think I thought "the fisherman's net" was just a metaphor!

I was running out of air at this point, but I managed to find the shadowy spot where I was supposed to hide my diver, then returned to the net and put the bottle in. I then had to wait until the net came back down empty before making my way out of the water. Boy was I happy to be back on land! The fisherman was sitting on the rocks, and I could see some buildings in the distance. I took a quick look back at my screenshots to see what exactly I was supposed to do once I arrived at my destination. “You must make contact with a female agent who will be disguised as a Muslim. You must use the code name, ICEMAN. She will have in her possession a map directing you.” Seems pretty straight forward, but I tried without success to talk to the fisherman before heading off in search of what I’d already figured out was Stacy.

Dude...I'm an American speaking Arabic! The least you could do is tell me how awesome I am!

I wandered into the area with buildings, but didn’t get very far before a man ordered me to stop, demanding I explain my presence. Apparently I was not able to explain why I was there in scuba diving attire, so was captured. Yet another game over! I restored a few times at this point, trying to go different ways to avoid capture. I wasn’t able to enter the buildings, but I was able to leave the screen off to the right by getting on the other side of the rocks in time. I continued from screen to screen, but soon began doubting myself. My instructions were to make contact with the agent as soon as I arrived to get a map. Had I missed her somehow? When I was captured yet again, I spent some time wandering the shore looking for her.

The masked avenger wandered the streets looking for trouble.

While “Iceman” was the code word I was supposed to speak to the agent, I thought I would just try it on the fisherman. To my surprise, he gave me a fish! The fish had a piece of fishing line in its mouth, so I pulled it out. There was something attached to the line, so I picked it up. It turned out to be a capsule, and inside the capsule was a small map. Hang on a second! Was this fisherman in front of me the agent? Surely not! I was a bit confused, but I looked at the map to find it had directions to a disguise. Well, they say that men are better map readers than women, and I generally consider myself to be pretty decent in that department, but I totally misread this map. I took the dogleg in the middle of the map to represent a pathway (that had exactly the same sort of angle) I’d seen earlier a couple of screens north and east, so that’s where I headed.

So you're giving me a map to find a disguise so I can find an agent that can give me a map. Anyone else see how stupid that is!?

I ended up in a rather tranquil scene, with a waterfall, a flamingo and Muslim woman by the edge of the water. I was informed that “I swear I’ve met this woman somewhere before”, so obviously it was Stacy disguised as a Muslim. I said the word “Iceman” to her, but all I got back was “the woman casts you a furtive glance but otherwise ignores you”. Huh? I tried everything I could think of, but she just wasn’t going to talk to me. After a short amount of time, I was captured yet again, so restored back to receiving the map from the fisherman. It suddenly dawned on me that there were two buildings on the map, whereas Stacy wasn’t actually situated near one. Perhaps the two buildings just to the north were the ones I was supposed to be checking out?

I see how it is! You only like me with my clothes off!

Inside the first building I typed “look” and was rewarded with a wooden crate containing a disguise for me. Hopefully that would stop me from being questioned all the time and maybe now Stacy would talk to me! This time the code word was met with “Hello John. Long way from Tahiti! I’m happy to see the mission is a success so far John. I wish you luck on the remainder of it”. That was it! Where’s my map? I typed “get map”, and only then did she give it to me, along with a key to her apartment and a phony ID. That seems pretty odd to me. Her only purpose for being there was to give this stuff to me, so why didn’t she just hand it over when she first saw me! Anyway, she promised to meet me at the apartment later and told me that “There are things in the apartment for you. You can find them in the kitchen.”, so I walked away to continue my mission. The end was appoaching!

That's it!? You risked your life in a dangerous foreign country to wish me luck!?

TO BE CONTINUED

Game 25: Codename: ICEMAN - Pixilation Detonation

Johnny Westland Journal Entry 5: “I knew navigating the Blackhawk through dangerous waters was going to be difficult, but I never imagined I was going to have to do so without the help of Captain Hawkins. He took a nasty fall today, leaving me to take on not one, but two Russian destroyers on my own. I have no idea how I managed to take them down without taking a hit myself, but I guess the training I had prior to this mission paid off! We’ve reached Tunisia, and I can now see the drilling rig that the CIA want me to destroy in the distance. It’s time to put on the scuba diving gear and take a more direct path through the Mediterranean. I really hope this dive vehicle does what it’s supposed to!”

The moment I, Johnny Westland...

Well, I made a lot of progress on the weekend, but I can’t say it was a lot of fun. Codename: ICEMAN continues to make me backtrack, and throws repetitive tasks at me that are clearly designed to make the game longer. It also suffers from some pretty serious parser limitations that make solving some puzzles if not impossible, far more difficult than they should be. There were at least a couple of occasions during the three hours plus I put into it where I was close to asking for assistance, only to eventually figure out was of cheating the system. Anyway, I’m getting ahead of myself and giving the game away (so to speak, don’t get excited). At the end of my last post I was finally in a position to take on the Russian destroyer with a functional weapon system.

...became first in command of the USS Blackhawk!

This section of the game really sucked. The manual gave me some basic hints about how to do battle, but the rest was really just trial and error. My instinct was to fire off as many torpedoes as I could, as quickly as I could, but I soon found out that the majority of them miss the target, leaving me a sitting duck when I run out of torpedoes. I reckon about one in every ten torpedoes actually hits the destroyer, so considering you only have a handful of torpedoes to fire, that pretty much forces the player to cheat. I eventually settled into a groove of firing one torpedo, waiting to see whether it would hit the destroyer, then saving my game if it did. Every time I missed, I restored and tried again. Only a matter of time I hear you thinking. Wrong!

That's clearly going to miss dude!

You see, the destroyer fired harpoons at me too, and these seemed to have a pretty damn high chance of hitting me. The manual suggested that diving would make it more difficult for the enemy to hit me, so I started diving as low as I could and then resurfacing while firing my torpedoes one at a time. In the end, I think I had to hit the destroyer four times for it to sink, but even then I had to cross my fingers that the harpoons already on their way towards me didn’t make contact. It probably took about half an hour for me to figure out how to cheat the system and then go through with it, which was tedious to say the least. Did anyone find a better way of beating this?

My supersize torpedoes will defeat your infrared beams any day you Ruskies!

Once the destroyer was dealt with, I received another encoded message from Washington, and yet another from the CIA. I’d figured by now that there was no way I was going to find out how to get into the safe or crack the CIA codes in the game. Since I knew that adding a 3 to each decoded number was the key to cracking the CIA codes (I only know this from a reader comment), it just seemed silly for me not to decode them. The first thing I did was decode the one I’d received much earlier in the game. “Russian war ships on patrol. Use extreme caution in Bering sea. Use alternate entry to harbor.” No shit! This begs the question though! Was there any way that I could have avoided contact with the Russians? I can’t see how I could possibly have used an alternate entry into the harbor.

So this is the message that you made impossible to decode. Not important or anything isn't it!

Regardless, I set about decoding the new Washington and CIA codes I’d received. The Washington message decoded as “Contacting fisherman… After exiting the water, contact agent for further instructions.”, while the CIA message decoded as “After polar crossing is achieved… Do not surface for remainder of mission.” Neither of these assisted me in the here and now, so all I could do was hop back behind the controls and head towards the next waypoint. As soon as I started moving I was informed of “many icebergs in the area” and advised to “turn on my TV monitor and slow down”. Once I figured out how to turn the TV on, I soon found myself navigating the sub through an iceberg obstacle course. What first looked easy turned out to be tedious once again.

I'm not trained to navigate this submarine through a field of tornadoes!

My first attempts to dodge the icebergs failed miserably, mostly due to the terrible collision detection in the game. Three hits and it was game over for me! My second attempt gave me more success, and after negotiating around six or so icebergs, I suddenly found myself in the clear. I’d expected some sort of message to pop up, but nothing happened. I started looking at my position on the map and wondering if I was supposed to be directing the ship towards the next waypoint or something. In the end I thought I must have missed something, so I restored back to the beginning of the icebergs and started again. This time I passed a lot more icebergs and eventually received a message telling me I’d scored 7 out of 10 for crossing the ice pack. It appears I discovered yet another bug on that second run through!

My six pack wouldn't rate that high!

With the icebergs behind me, I wondered whether I should be applying the CIA message and remaining submerged for the remainder of the journey. Was that the “polar crossing” it mentioned? While I was pondering that, I was informed of “active sonar on 150 degree arc, 100 miles south of true north. Sonar is stationary...could be ice station looking for us”. I sat there for a while waiting for another message, but received a game over screen for not responding to the sonar. What was I supposed to do? I restored and this time I got up and went and had a chat to the sonar man (next to the radio man). He was far too busy to talk to me, so that wasn’t the answer. Eventually I just tried typing “contact ice station” and that turned out to be correct!

No thanks to you buddy!

This contact resulted in two new messages from Washington and the CIA respectively. The former message was “Rendezvous with USS Coontz...36 degrees latitude 12 degrees longitude. Listen for erratic sonar. At that time, signal presence with one active ping. Pass through straits under Coontz.” The latter message was “Diversion tactic necessary. Locate nearest off-shore drilling rig and destroy. Do not use Blackhawk weaponry.” The coordinates mentioned in the Washington message were in fact my destination coordinates, so I only had to worry about that on arrival. The CIA message had me worried though. Was I supposed to find this drilling rig now somehow? Should I dive and plant the explosives I found in the torpedoes room underneath the rig? I decided the game would soon let me know if I was meant to have made a diversion already, so I hopped back behind the controls.

One active ping you say. Easy...what can go wrong!?

I immediately received more sonar messages: “Reporting inversion layer at 1,000 feet. Reporting trenches on ocean floor.” Navigation then informed me that we must be above Reykjanes Ridge, whatever that is. I knew from my earlier manual readings that inversion layers were warm sections of water that can be used as cover from active sonar. I began my descent to 1,000 feet, assuming that I was about to be attacked again. I received a bunch of other messages that basically informed me that a sub was “dogging” and “pinging” us from somewhere, and eventually that they were flooding their tubes to fire upon us. I thought to myself “no problem, I’ll just use my cheating tactic again and this should be all over in a jiffy”. Nope!

I can't be a seasoned submariner because if I was, I'd know what the hell I was supposed to do!

You’ve probably picked up on how tedious I’ve found some aspects of this game, but this section took the cake by far. I spent close to an hour trying to destroy this damn Russian sub without being destroyed myself, and at times I was tearing my hair out. The sub rapidly fired torpedoes my way with pretty much all of them making contact. One hit was enough to send me down to Davy Jones, meaning I had absolutely no chance of hitting it multiple times prior. I figured the inversion layer was the key to success, but even if I sat at 1,000 feet or just under that, I kept getting crushed. It was by pure luck that I dove to just past 1,100 feet, and suddenly the torpedoes started missing me!

Oh...so by 1,000 feet, you meant 1,100 feet! My bad!

Even still, since I had so few stingers (apparently I could only use stingers at this depth) at my disposal, I was forced to use the one shot save and restore tactics as I used during my previous battle. The major problem wasn’t defeating the sub though, it was dodging the three or four torpedoes that were already in the water once my final stinger made contact. By the time I hit the sub three times and destroyed it, the Russians had entered the inversion layer, meaning I could no longer just sit there and wait for their weapons to miss me. I must have restored about twenty times after beating the submarine, only to watch as I followed them into oblivion. I literally had to play through the whole scenario multiple times until I finally managed to get to that last hit with few enough torpedoes in the water to match the amount of decoys I had. Not fun!

I really wish the whole submarine bit had started with "Forty-six hours later..."

I was very pleased to find myself at latitude 36, longitude 12, once this test was over. I’d made my destination, and hopefully would no longer be required to play impossible battleships for the rest of the game! As the Washington message had suggested, the USS Coontz was waiting for me, so I signalled them with one ping (the first time I pinged them twice and the pedantic bastards left the scene!). I was then given an overhead view, with the USS Coontz represented by a yellow cross. I needed to navigate my ship into the same space as the moving target, which I apparently did well enough to receive 4 out of 5 navigation skill points.

Oh come on! Surely you can ignore one extra ping! Come back you pedantic bastard! I'm on your side!

I then had to keep the USS Blackhawk as close to the cross as possible as it zig-zagged across the screen. Not a difficult task when it wasn’t changing direction much, but very challenging when it suddenly decided to take a right angled turn and go up a gear in speed. Subs apparently do eight point turns while attempting to change direction at speed! Succeeding in sticking with the cross pretty much involved knowing what it was going to do next and therefore being able to prepare for it. After a few failed attempts, I stayed close enough to the USS Coontz to receive a navigational skills rating of 8 out of 10, and was able to move on. I’d reached Tunisia, and a weak captain tapped me on the shoulder to congratulate me on my success!

This is me trying to stay exactly underneath the yellow cross. Admiring my talent aren't you!

The captain told me that “It looks like we have more on our hands than we anticipated. There’s a gunboat out there keeping a close watch on the entrance to the harbor!” I was then told to take a look through the periscope at our predicament. I was able to move the periscope left and right a full 360 degrees, but there really wasn’t all that much to look at. I certainly couldn’t see anything that looked like a gunboat, unless the grey blob merging into what appears to be the mainland was it. I did come across a drilling rig out to sea though, which immediately reminded me of the CIA message telling me to blow one up. I took note of the fact the rig seemed to be at 283 degrees (and that the grey blob was at 40 degrees), and left the periscope.

Yes...that thing! At least that one looks like something.

The captain was nowhere to be found at this point, and he hadn’t exactly left me with any instructions. I tried getting behind the controls to see what would happen, but received a game over message telling me I was on a time limited mission. What mission!? Well, the obvious thing to do was to try and blow up that drilling rig, and I wondered whether the key to the storage room compartment was now in the machinist mate’s possession. I wondered whether the compartment held scuba diving gear, rather than the radiation suit I’d first assumed. Well, the machinist mate did have the key now, which he gave me, so I was about to find out whether my way of thinking was on the money.

It's amazing how often people only find keys when they need the contents within the compartment that hosts the lock in adventure games.

I used the key to unlock the door and then watched as Petty Officer Johnson entered the room and take the scuba equipment out of it, vowing to take it to the escape hatch for me. I immediately wandered up to the engine room and collected the dive vehicle. I then entered the escape hatch, put on the scuba gear, and pressed the big red button. Watered flow into the room, so I opened the hatch, and swam out into the Mediterranean Sea! The game told me that I had “a strong feeling of insecurity” as I directed the dive vehicle away from the Blackhawk. That feeling turned out to be well founded, as less than thirty seconds after leaving the ship, the DV-3X diver malfunctioned and I was left for dead!

Well you can't blame me can you?

Apparently I was supposed to check the diver, as if I’d done so I would have noted there was a missing washer. Clearly I’m going to have to collect said washer from the machine room and insert it using a wrench from the drawer in the engine room, but somehow I doubt even that is going to be n easy process. I continue to be thwarted at every stage of Codename: ICEMAN, and often I’ve only become aware of what I “should” have done after not doing it causes a game over message (and usually my death). I’m determined to finish this game, but I can’t say it’s been much fun! At this rate I’m going to have to postpone playing Emmanuelle so I can join Chet in playing Hero’s Quest from this weekend onwards. Just wrapping this game up in time may prove challenging!

I guess I should have learnt from the lessons taught to me in Police Quest.

Session Time: 3 hours 30 minutes
Total Time: 12 hours 00 minutes

Note Regarding Spoilers and Companion Assist Points: I've written a set of rules regarding spoilers and companion assist points. Please read it here before before making any comments that could be considered a spoiler in any way. The short of it is that no points will be given for hints or spoilers given in advance of me requiring one. Please...try not to spoil any part of the game for me...unless I really obviously need the help...or I specifically request assistance. In this instance, I've not made any requests for assistance. Thanks!