Hmmm...I thought this would be more difficult. What's going to happen to stop me?
Rather than head straight for the cliff, I paid a visit to the big tree, hoping to climb it with the two paddles I now had in my possession. I stuck the first one into the first hole and the second one in the second, then walked across them. To my utter shock, when Guybrush stepped on the oar it snapped in half, and he fell violently. He lost consciousness, and the screen took on a red tint. Guybrush eventually stood up, but it was clear that he was only dreaming. An old man and woman approached him, and he recognised them as his parents. They informed him that they’d come looking for him, and that they had some information. When Guybrush asked what that information was, his mother told him that they would give it to him in the form of a song. All of a sudden their clothes and flesh dropped off, and two skeletons were left standing there. They began to dance, and sang the bones song that many kids are taught when they’re young, albeit in a slightly messed up form: “The rib bone’s connected to the arm bone. The arm bone’s connected to the head bone. The head bone’s connected to the leg bone.” They danced around a bit longer before departing to the right of screen. As they did so, someone crept up behind Guybrush. It was LeChuck!
Monkey Island 2 is just filled with shocks and surprises, constantly pulling the rug out from under the player.
I thought this was going to be a really moving part of the game,...
...but it turned out to be complete madness. Clearly influenced by Disney's A Silly Symphony, the skeleton dance is quite impressive!
LeChuck literally scared the hair off Guybrush’s head, then laughed hysterically. Guybrush spluttered that he’d killed the villain, but LeChuck responded with “You didn’t kill me, you little moron! I was already a ghost when you met me! You just destroyed my spiritual essence. A favour that I will now return!” Suddenly LeChuck was no longer there, and in his place was Guybrush as he appeared in The Secret of Monkey Island, holding the spray that he used to defeat his nemesis on that occasion. The nightmare abruptly ended when past Guybrush sprayed present Guybrush in the face. It was all over, and I wasn’t sure what I was supposed to make of any of it. Was the skeleton dance and song really a clue? Was it related to what I already predicted regarding the crypt in the cemetery? I really wasn’t sure. What I was sure about though was that the oar I’d just found at Elaine’s mansion was now broken to pieces, so there was no way that I was going to climb the tree now. Was I even supposed to, or had the dream been the whole purpose of the puzzle? Could I fix the oar? No, but I knew someone who might be able to. Woody the woodsmith!
Literally off his head!
Does any of this mean anything, or was it just a nightmare? I guess time will tell.
Since it was on the way back to Captain Dread’s ship, I briefly visited the cliff to see if I could recover the map piece. As expected, it was stuck halfway down the cliff-face, well out of my reach. I felt fairly certain that this was why I needed the fisherman’s rod, so left it there for now and sailed back to Scabb Island. I gave the broken oar to Woody, and was thrilled when the woodsmith took an interest in it: Hmmm…looks like a massive fracture. If you’re gonna be using this, I’d better reinforce it for ya.” He immediately got to work, and within seconds I was holding an oar that was reinforced with steel and alloy splints. I raced back to the big tree and once again attempted to climb it using the two paddles. It worked, and Guybrush ascended to the top of the tree where there were three huts. The first hut contained a massive pile of paper, which on further inspection was revealed to be hundreds and hundreds of maps! I attempted to look through the pile, but Guybrush informed me that “Even if one were a piece of the map to Big Whoop, I would never be able to find it!” Oh man…the people at LucasArts really had a good time making this game. Every time I feel like I’m making progress, it smacks me in the face and laughs at my misfortune.
If the fishing rod doesn't retrieve this map piece, then I'll create a video of me playing through the entirety of Les Manley 1 and 2 back to back.
Now this is every kid's fantasy treehouse!
Of course it is! Why wouldn't it be?!
There was nothing else of interest in the first hut, and Guybrush informed me that he couldn’t see anything worth investigating in the second one either. It was then that I noticed there was a telescope up in the third and final hut, so made my way up there. At first I wondered whether I might be able to use it right where it was, but when I selected Use and clicked on it, the game simply waited for me to pick an item to use with it. Did I need to put the lighthouse lens into it? When that didn’t work, I tried simply picking it up, and found that I could. Well at least I’d gained something for all my trouble. I had a think about where I might be able to use the telescope, but couldn’t come up with anything that seemed likely. I tried unsuccessfully to use it through the window in Elaine’s room, but when that didn’t work I once again had to assume that I’d know when the time came. What now? Yep, I’d once again reached that point where I’d run out of leads, so would have to put my thinking cap on.
Excellent! Another item discovered for which I can think of no use.
What did I have in my inventory? I’d already used the shovel, the polish, the voodoo recipe, the spit encrusted paper, the knife, the string, the stick, the cheese squiggles, the voodoo doll and the pins. It was possible that one or more of them would have another use, but it seemed more likely that I would find a use for my unused items. Those items included the white hanky, the organ, the banana, the parrot chow packet, the Captain Kate Capsize brochure, the lighthouse lens, the Hook Island vacation certificate, the straw, the alcohol, and the telescope. What unsolved puzzles did I have? Well, there was the spitting contest. Clearly the alcohol and the straw were going to play a role in the solution to that. Then there was the fishing rod wager. I had a strong feeling that the fish in the kitchen mansion would be the solution to that. Oh, and I hadn’t figured out how to get the crypt key from Stan’s shop yet, but was fairly certain it would involve trapping the salesman in the coffin. Come to think of it, I still needed to find a way to charter a ship of Kate too, which would presumably result in the recovery of the Mad Monkey figurehead that the shopkeeper wanted in exchange for the map piece. When I sat back and thought through things, I had the feeling that I was on the right track with most of these puzzles. All I needed was a catalyst, but I frustratingly couldn’t think of what or where it might be. There was only one thing left to do. I was going to have to methodically revisit every location on all three islands.
I had some inkling as to the purpose of most of the puzzles I was currently confronted with, but not this one. I really have no idea what the pump is for.
I won’t describe the entirety of my journey back through all three islands, and will instead focus on the notable findings that I had. The first notable thing was that I had a new dialogue option with Kate, which I can only assume appeared after my purchase of alcohol in the bar. I was able to ask her whether she was the same Kate that bought all the near-grog from the Bloody Lip, to which she responded “Yeah, and you can’t have any of it, so don’t ask.” I had a feeling that combining the near-grog with the green alcohol mix might give me the concoction I needed to win the spitting contest, but had no way of finding out whether I was correct. The second notable thing that occurred was that Wally accepted the lighthouse lens as a replacement for the monocle I stole from him earlier. It seemed obvious to me that I needed to give him the lens so that he could read the map that I will give to him down the track, but it wasn’t of much help now. It did remove another item from my unused list though, which was helpful for the process I was undertaking. What the hell was the brochure for? Where could I use the telescope? When would the vacation certificate be needed? It was then that I took another good look at the parrot chow packet. I’d been certain that I would be able to use it to distract the parrot that loves its own reflection in the souvenir shop, but hadn’t found a way to use it. I felt like this was my best lead, so followed it.
Not the catalyst I was looking for, but one less item to think about is still progress.
I spent a good five to ten minutes trying to use the parrot chow packet on and around the parrot without success. Still, I was more certain than ever that there was something to be done there, so stuck to the task. Eventually I started focussing on other items around the room, and noted that the well-polished old saw would be a pretty handy item to have in an adventure game. I tried picking it up, which hadn’t worked with the items in the store that I tried to do that with up until that moment. I was gobsmacked when Guybrush responded to my request by telling the shopkeeper that he wanted to buy it! The shopkeeper seemed up for it too: “I see you have an eye for quality. That’ll be 25 pieces o’ eight.” I accepted his terms and suddenly had a saw in my inventory. Rather than consider what the saw might be useful for, I found myself madly pondering what else I might actually be able to buy. Needless to say, I attempted to pick up every item in the store, resulting in the purchase of the sign that reads “Beware of Parrot” for 5 pieces of eight, the ship’s horn for 40 pieces of eight, a feather pen for 10 pieces of eight, a hubcap for 50 pieces of eight, a wreath for 20 pieces of eight, a pirate hat for 30 pieces of eight, and a rock and roll collector’s plate for 199 pieces of eight. All the other items in the store were either display models or not for sale. In just a few minutes I’d gone from not having a clue what to do to having a whole stack of new items to play around with!
Sadly I couldn't buy Indy's whip.
Before I left the store to go and try out all my new kit, I noticed that there was now a large hook sticking out of the wall where the sign used to be. Looking at it revealed that it was an authentic pirate’s fishhook. I immediately thought about my attempts to manufacture my own fishing rod with the stick and the string. Could this be the final piece to that puzzle? I tried to pick it up, but it was firmly stuck in the wall. I tried a bunch of unlikely things to get it out, but had to admit defeat. I decided it was likely just a red herring, and that the real solution was indeed to steal one of the chef’s fish at the mansion. Suddenly it dawned on me that I still hadn't solved the puzzle I’d come to the store to solve. How could I use the parrot chow packet with the parrot, and what would that achieve anyway? Hang on a minute! Could it be that I needed to use the packet with the hook, therefore drawing the parrot’s attention away from the mirror? As soon as I had the thought, I knew that it must be correct. I used the packet on the hook and shouted in joy as Guybrush followed my instructions. The bird did indeed shift along his perch and start watching the the parrot on the packet. While it was distracted, I attempted to buy the mirror: “Alrighty. That’ll be 15 pieces o’ eight.” I eagerly handed over the coin, and admired the reflective new addition in my inventory. Victory!
As I stepped out of the store, a potential solution pretty much smacked me in the face. Augustus DeWaat was still standing next to his cannon, waiting for the mail ship to arrive. I figured that I might be able to use the ship horn to fool him into thinking that it had arrived. I clicked Use and then the horn, and Guybrush pulled it out and gave it an almighty blow. Just as I’d hoped, DeWaat was fooled: “That sounds like the mail boat! I’d better fire the cannon!” He did exactly that, and then the spitmaster unexpectedly arrived on the scene to find out whether there was any mail for him. He didn’t stay long, but the fact that he came must have meant something. I looked at all of my new items and tried to come up with a likely use for them. Was there anything I needed to cut with a saw? No. Was there any use for a sign, a hubcap, a wreath, a collector’s plate or a pirate hat? The only thing I could think of was that I might be able to use the feather on Governor Phatt’s feet. I didn’t know why I might want to do that, but his feet were sticking out of the bed. I had to try something right?
Session Time: 2 hours 05 minutes
Total Time: 8 hours 30 minutes
My delight at having solved this puzzle was once again diminished by the fact I had no idea what the mirror might be used for.
I'd figured out the use for the horn,...
...but to what purpose?
As I arrived at Phatt Island to go and try this unlikely solution, I stopped in to read the wanted poster to see whether any more of my crimes had been added to the list. While I was reading it, I just happened to notice the similarity between the brochure I had with Kate Capsize’s head on it and the image of Guybrush on the poster. I wasn’t at all convinced that it would work, but I tried using the leaflet with the poster. It did work! Kate’s face was now on the poster instead of my own. I’d already done a number of bitchy things to innocent people during the game, but this one surely took the cake. A short while after I left that screen, I was shown a cut-scene of Kate arriving on Phatt Island. She and Phatt’s guard stood in front of the poster and looked at it in just the same way the guard and I had done earlier in the game. Clearly not the sharpest tool in the shed, the guard mistook Kate for Guybrush due to the poster’s image, and pulled a weapon on her: “I don’t know how you got out of jail, but I’m taking you back in.” I immediately set out for the jail, and found Kate in the same cell that Guybrush had been locked in. A cell that I just so happened to have the key for. Progress was being made, even if the outcome of all my small victories had not yet become apparent.
Of all the things you could do to someone,...
...this has to be one of the nastiest.
Luckily I'm also the guy that can get her out of this predicament.
Total Time: 8 hours 30 minutes